Friday, September 30, 2005

After all the crushes have faded, and all my wishful thinking is wrong

I'm jaded.

I hate it.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Biyaheng Peyups

Alas-singko y medya ng hapon, nakaupo ako sa isang sulok ng Shakey's nang biglang magsipasok ang isang batalyong estudyante galing sa eskuwelahang pambabae sa kabilang kanto. Nagsi-akyat ang mga dalagita sa pangalawang palapag, kung saan mukhang mayroong birthday party. Na-kumpirma ang hula ko nang sabay-sabay magkantahan ng "Happy Birthday!" ang mga tao sa taas na sinundan ng malalakas na halakhak.

May labinlimang minuto na rin akong nandito, matapos kong umalis mula sa trabaho nang alas singko. Sa wakas, dinala na ng waiter sa akin ang kahon ng pizza na in-order ko, at dali-dali akong lumabas ng pinto.

Nagsimula akong maglakad papunta sa MRT station. Dahan-dahan kong binunot ang pre-paid na MRT card mula sa aking bulsa gamit ang kaliwang kamay, habang tangan ko pa rin sa kanan ang pizza. Bumulaga sa akin ang mahabang pila sa baggage security inspection pag-akyat ko nang hagdanan, at napaisip tuloy ako kung dapat bang nag-taxi na lang dapat ako. May isang oras pa naman ako, pero ayoko lang talagang ma-late ngayon.

Nalaman ko na hindi naman pala 'to magigig problema pag-akyat ko sa boarding platform, kung saan kakaunti lang ang North-bound na pasaherong katulad ko. Kabaliktaran ito sa kabilang gilid ng mga riles, kung saan parang sardinas ang mga tao. Sandali lamang at sakay na ako ng isang tren, at ilan pang sandali ay lulan na ako ng jeepney papunta sa unibersidad.


Bumaba ako sa may food center, kung saan bumili ako ng dalawang large na frozen Coke, at sinimulan ko na ang paglakad patungo sa building nila. May kaba na pumasok sa aking katawan, kaba na palagi kong nararamdaman sa tuwing makikita ko siya. Nangyari ito noong unang beses na nakita ko siya, at nangyayari pa rin ito hanggang ngayon. Hindi na siguro ako nasanay. Tuwing nakikita ko siya, naroon pa rin ang pagkasabik.

Hindi pa tapos ang klase pagdating ko sa building. Tumingin muna ako sa cell phone ko, at nalaman ko na mayroon pa akong mga labinlimang minuto bago siya lumabas. Nakahanap ako ng isang bangko may limang metro ang layo. Napansin ko sa pagtingin sa paligid na malaki na ang idinilim ng langit mula nang umalis ako sa pizza parlor kanina.

Labinlimang minuto lang dapat, pero animo'y oras ang iniupo ko doon sa matigas na bangko. Sa wakas, may ingay na nagmula sa classroom, na kung iisipin ay hindi naiba mula sa ingay na mula sa party sa pizza parlor kanina, na naghudyat ng pagtapos sa klase. Kita paglabas niya sa pinto ang pagkakaupo ko, at doon ako, nag-aantay at nakangiti, mukhang tanga. At siyempre, nandoon pa rin ang kaba.

Ngumiti siya nang makita niya ako. Surpresa dapat, pero hindi siya mukhang na-surpresa. Sa halip, mukhang nahulaan niya na pupunta ako dito, at nakangiti siya dahil masaya siya dahil tama ang hula niya.

Siyempre, sa ngiti pa lang niya, suko na ako. Palagi namang ganyan eh. Noong una ko siyang makilala, may dalawang summer na ang nakakaraan, ganyan din ang nangyari. Lumapit ako sa tabi niya para magtanong, ngumiti siya, at nakalimutan ko nang lahat pati na ang pangalan ko. Kinailangan ko pa ng dalawang sandali para lang maalala kung ano ang dapat kong sabihin sa kanya.

Swerte na lang ako, dahil kinailangan din niya ng dalawang sandali para makarating sa kinauupuan ko. Nasa kanan ko ang pizza, kaya't sa kaliwa ko siya naupo, sabay tanong, "O, ba't nandito ka?"

Nakangiti pa rin akong mukhang tanga sa buong panahon na 'yon. Binigay ko sa kanya ang isang frozen Coke, na agad niyang ininom. "Wala eh, pinagdala ako ng guwapo mong boyfriend ng pizza."

"Hindi naman guwapo 'yung boyfriend ko ah."

Tumawa kami. Sinimulan kong buksan ang kahon ng pizza, na pinahirap dahil sa pagkakatali ng plastic na tali nito. Kumuha ako ng susi sa bulsa ko para ipamputol, habang tinanong ko siya, "Kumusta naman ang araw mo? Hindi ka naman nila inapi? Tara, awayin natin!"

"Ha ha, hindi naman." Kwinento niya 'yung nangyari kanina sa dalawang kasama niya sa org sa tambayan. Nag-propose 'yung lalake sa babae, may kasama pang isang malaking bouquet ng chrysanthemums. Siyempre, hindi na nakahindi 'yung babae.

Hirap pa rin ako sa pagputol sa tali ng kahon ng pizza nang maramdaman kong ilapat niya ang kanyang ulo sa balikat ko. Umakbay ang kaliwang kamay ko sa kanyang balikat at tiningnan ko siya, na nakapikit na ang mga mata. Bumulong ako, nagtanong na halos retorikal, "Pagod ka na 'no?"

Tumango siya.

"Gusto mo, kwentuhan na lang kita tungkol sa girlfriend ko?"

Isang malaking ngiti ang namuo sa kanyang mga labi, at muli siya tumango.

Bumubulong pa rin, sinimulan ko ang aking kwento, "Alam mo kase, yung girlfriend ko, sobrang ganda no'n. Kung direktor nga lang ako ng commercial, kinuha ko na 'yun eh. Bagay na bagay 'yun, lalo na sa commercial ng Tanduay."

"Baliw."

"Hindi, pero talaga, ang ganda no'n, nakakatunaw 'yung ngiti. Ang dami ngang may crush doon dati eh. Pero hindi lang 'yun ha, sobrang bait no'n. Wala ngang masabi 'yung buong baranggay doon sa babaeng 'yun eh."

"Talaga lang ha?"

"Oo 'no. Kung kandidato nga siguro 'yun sa eleksyon, nanalo na 'yun ng landslide."

"Sira ka talaga."

"Ha ha, pero totoo, sobrang astig 'yung babaeng 'yun. Ang dami ngang nagtataka kung paano ako naging boyfriend niya eh."

"Eh sa palagay mo naman, bakit?"

"Hindi ako sigurado ha, pero palagay ko, tatlong letra lang 'yan eh: KPR."

"KPR?"

"Katawang pang-romansa. Katawan ko lang ang habol niya."

"Baliw!" ang sigaw niya, sabay kurot sa aking tagiliran. "O, tapos?"

"May tapos pa? Hindi pa ba tapos 'yung kwento ko?"

"Hindi pa!" ang pataray niyang sagot.

"Sige... uhm, tapos minsan may pagka-selosa yun..."

"Hindi naman ah!"

"Ay, hindi ba? Ha ha, o sige, hindi na nga. Hindi siya selosa. Sobrang understanding nga 'yun eh."

Tinapos ko ang aking "kwento" habang nanatiling nakalapat ang ulo niya sa kaliwa kong balikat. Maya't maya siyang umaalma para ibahin ang ibang detalye ng "kwento" ko ayon sa gusto niya. Sa wakas, nabuksan ko na ang kahon ng pizza.

Gamit ang kanan kong kamay, kumuha ako ng isang pirasong pizza, sabay bulong sa kanya ng, "Kain na." Minulat niya ang kanyang mga mata at itinaas ang kanyang ulo mula sa akin balikat para magpasubo. Pagkagat, muli niyang inilapat ang kanyang ulo sa balikat ko at ipinikit ang kanyang mga mata.

Ibinaba ko ang piraso ng pizza sa kahon, kumuha ng napkin, at pinunasan ang kanyang mga labi. Pagkatapos ay hinagkan ko ang kanyang noo, bago ko ibinulong kung ano ang nararamdaman ko para sa kanya.

Isinulat, December 2002
Isinalin sa Tagalog, November 2003

Monday, September 26, 2005

I've been reading

Acquired

*** bought 20 August 2005, off avalon.ph

Pure Drivel by Steve Martin

About a Boy by Nick Hornby
-- bought because my previous copy had a movie cover; gave that copy to Luz; this copy currently lent to Alekos

Microserfs by Douglas Coupland

Dead-eye Dick by Kurt Vonnegut


*** 4 September 2005, at the National Bookstore, SM Megamall

Summerland by Michael Chabon


*** 18 September 2005, Bounds Bookshop

Eight Stories by Alfred A. Yuson

Angela's Ashes by Frank McCourt

A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole

The Horse Whisperer by John Evans

(great, great buys... I got all of these books, two of which are Pulitzer Prize winners, for less than 500 pesos)


*** 24 September 2005, again off avalon.ph

Batman: The Dark Knight Returns by Frank Miller

On the Road by Jack Kerouac


Read

A Little Princess by Frances Hodgson Burnett
-- yep, the Sarah story, bought the book sometime last year at Booksale at Megamall for Icay, (who's incidentally celebrating her birthday tomorrow); good read.

Songbook by Nick Hornby
-- borrowed from one of my bosses, finished in one sitting; Hornby might be a better essayist than he is a novelist; was laughing out loud in the office couch during the part where he argues why Marvin Gaye's Let's Get It On is a terrible, terrible song for when you're having sex.

No Shoes, No Shirt, No Problem by Jeff Foxworthy
-- bio slash joke collection from the redneck comedian; I bought this book for something like twenty bucks from Booksale Megamall last year; never found Foxworthy that funny (he goes for too many easy laughs), but the book does have the some poignant and hilarious moments.

A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers
-- great and patently original writing, but it kind of falls apart in the second part (he does warn you about it in the preface); he writes with a lot of anger, partly because of a sense of loss, and partly because of that sense of entitlement (followed by frustration) that every twentysomething feels; the anger leaps out of the pages and by the end of the book, I want to take someone's head off with a baseball bat.

Pure Drivel by Steve Martin
-- a bunch of essays written by the veteran comedian originally for The New Yorker, the essays have that same manic energy that was a trademark of his early stand-up and cinema work; some of the essays work and are just simply hilarious, but others come off as too eager to please; everything is hit-or-miss, with a few more hits than misses, which is the same thing you could say about his last few movies as well

Dead-eye Dick by Kurt Vonnegut
-- a very oddball story, but I loved it well enough to consider buying more Vonnegut books off avalon.ph, I just can't decide whether to go with Slaughterhouse Five or Hocus Pocus

Summerland by Michael Chabon
-- a nice little fantasy story, and it worked well for me because of the baseball angle; despite the fantasy theme, the tone plays like Kavalier and Clay, and it's just as grand; already bought Chabon's short story collection Werewolves in Their Youth off avalon.ph

Microserfs by Douglas Coupland
-- liked this one better than Generation X; it's definitely funnier, and doesn't feel as contrived (although it still does feel a bit contrived)

Batman: The Dark Knight Returns by Frank Miller
-- many people point to this as one of the two greatest comic book stories ever, alongside Alan Moore's Watchmen, which certainly makes it the greatest Batman story ever; however, I've always held a special place in my heart for...

Batman: Year One by Frank Miller
-- originally Frank Miller's re-telling of Batman's origin, it was so good that it became part of the official Batman canon; a lot of elements made it into Batman Begins, which would explain why that movie was so fucking brilliant.


Reading

On the Road by Jack Kerouac
-- so far, so good; tell you all about it next time.

Eight Stories by Alfred A. Yuson
-- just finished the first story, which was alright; can't seem to get into his work though.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Another candle fades away

Former PCGG Chair Haydee Yorac passed away this morning. She was last year's Magsaysay Awardee for Government Service. I wrote last year about an interview with her by CNN Talk Asia's Lorraine Hahn:

[Atty. Yorac] discussed how, when she took over, there were only 13 lawyers with the government agency, so she went back to the University of the Philippines and recruited bright, young faculty members to join her in her crusade to recover ill-gotten wealth. Today, she says, the number of lawyers have increased to 41.

This prompted Lorraine Hahn to ask her, as idealistic as she was, if it weren't tough for her to expect the same kind of idealism and passion from the people she recruited to her cause. To this, Atty. Yorac simply answered that it wasn't, because as remarkable as her idealism and passion is, it wasn't unique to her. She wasn't cynical, she was never cynical, and she never believed that she was alone.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

This is how we do things in the OC

Sports Guy Bill Simmons had a spectacular email exchange with Josh Schwartz, the creator of my favorite television show, The OC. My favorite part:

Simmons: But here's the one mistake you made that was incomprehensible to me: Dumping Olivia Wilde (Marissa's lesbian crush) midway through Season 2. Not only was she the best actress on the show other than Seth's Mom, she was a Pantheon TV Babe -- right up there with Cheryl Ladd and Jaclyn Smith on "Charlie's Angels," Heather Locklear on "Melrose Place," Nicole Eggert on "Charles in Charge," Nell Carter on "Gimme a Break" and everyone else. HOW COULD YOU GET RID OF HER!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! This was like giving away Google stock four years ago! I will never get over this. She is going to be a huge star some day and we both know it. Please explain yourself.


Schwartz:Dude, I am right there with you. Whose idea do you think it was to have her in a relationship with Marissa? But the network was very nervous -- it was an extremely conservative time in our country (thank Janet Jackson for that) and everyone was freaking out. We had a whole episode where every kiss between them was cut out, just so I could get one kiss in the Rainy Day Women episode. I was literally on the phone with Broadcast, Standards and Practices bartering for kisses. It was a battle, and The Powers That Be are part of a big corporation, and were going in front of Congress at the time (every network was) -- so I understand they are all good people who were under a lot of pressure. But they wanted that story wrapped up as fast as humanly possible and Alex moving on out of the OC. But Olivia is a superstar. She was great in the part. I would have her back on the show in a heartbeat. And she's going to have a huge career, I totally agree.

But if you want Alex back, America -- you're going to have to VOTE BUSH OUT OF OFFICE.


Oh, and of course, this:

Simmons: Please confirm or deny whether...

You had to turn Luke into a good guy because William Zabka was threatening to sue you unless you paid him royalties.

Schwartz: That's how we pitched "The OC" originally. It was the Karate Kid without the karate.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Curious lang ako, kasi pinag-uusapan namin dito sa office

Ano ang paborito mong kanta ng Beatles?

Bakit?

Labels: ,

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Your Boyfriend Sucks

I was just listening to the song Your Boyfriend Sucks by The Ataris. Anyway, right near the end of the song, there's this little mumbling monologue which I couldn't understand, and because I feel like it, I decided to search for the words:

"Alright,listen to me. You pull up right where she is, right? Before you get out of the car, you lock both doors. Then, you get outta the car, you walk over to her. You bring her over to the car. Take out the key, put it in the lock, open the door for her. Then you let her get in. Then you close the door for her. Then you walk around the back of the car and you look through the rear window. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button for you so you can get in, dump her."

"Just like that? "

"Listen to me kid, if she doesn't reach over and lift up that button for you, so you can get in, that means she's a selfish broad and all you're seeing is the tip of the iceberg. You dump her and you dump her fast."

Eyng?

Labels:

ultraelectromagneticblog!
 

Weekly Top Artists - Powered by Last.FM


Subscribe to this blog

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons License.

Powered by Blogger

Listed on BlogShares

Pisay 98 Blog
Pisay 98 Website
Pisay 98 Message Boards

Bookish Bimbo
Brooding Pit
cartwheels seven times around the oval
The Ergonomic Quotient
Fire Light Song
For the Mail!
Garden Fresh
I'm ur pAL!!!
the jembunao experience
life, the universe, and everything
The Mighty Dacs
Pro Gamer to Programmer
Purple World
Riverwind
The Raven and the Stormcrow
The sad success story of the corporate slave
Sakura Mind Speaks
Si Yayan, Si Michel at ang Diwata
Sixteenth Floor
Verbal Diarrhea
The Wandering Geek
Whatever You
The Unbearable Lightness of Being Me

502 Bad Gateway
Across the Green Plains
ako? ako. ako. lagi na lang ako...
Anime West
The Buckfutter Blog
Contrast Medium
Locoflip's Xanga Site
Gaming Nookie
getting by...
Just The Type 2 Have 1
life of a kkmonster
karloCastertroy
the keep
Lock and Load
Memories From Dinner Last Night
Mic Olivares' Blog
Morning Has Broken
Paradiddles
Princess Toni's Enchanted Forest
Random Thoughts
So Lovely
Think, Pats! Think!!

The story so far

September 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
February 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009

www.flickr.com
This is a Flickr badge showing public photos from jtordecilla. Make your own badge here.


Home
Instant Pancit Canton
The Prose Portal
Email

A Dose Of Cynicism
Adventures in TV Land
Delusions of Grandeur
first draft
Freedom Sessions
Karmic Backstab
Indulgence
Perpetual Paranoia
Project Manila
Sky of Words
Small Furry Alien
telenobela
TravelKage
walanjo ka daril!


100 tears away
55 Words (and more)
Astig-Mama-Tism
Blogging from the UAE
Car Driver
Chaos Theory
Ederic @ Cyberspace
flatride.com
frances.effronte.org
Howie Severino's Sidetrip
The Life of an Earthbound Angel
Manuel L. Quezon III
Mimi and Karl Wedding Photography
moodswings
na(g)wawala
The New Online Confessions
nitpicky.org
No White Flag
Out of Bed
Pinay by the Bay
Rebel Pixel Productions
sablay.org
the silpur life
the sky sweetheart
Some Kind of Wonderful
Tapuy Moments
thinking about tomorrow
The Year of the Dog Woman
Weapon of Choice

Binibini
Clang-Fu
Four-point Play
The Histrionics of a Balding Drama King
i came, i saw, i blogged
intelektwal interkors
The Jason Journals
Mental Foreplay
Orange Pocket
Paiwinklebloo
Paperbag Writer
Peyups.com
Renaissance Girl
Seasonal Plume

avalon.ph
Bill Simmons
Dave Barry
Digg
Everything
Get Firefox!
Guardian Books
HoopsHype
I, Cringley
IMDB
Inside Hoops
Joel on Software
KDE-Look
Lawrence Lessig
Mark Cuban
Newsforge
Pop Matters
Reddit
Richard M. Stallman
Roger Ebert
Salon.com
Slam! Links
Slashdot
The Onion
The Onion AV Club
Wikipedia
Wil Wheaton